Monday, August 30, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Capricorn Horoscope for week of August 19, 2010
The poet Jean Perrin dreamed "of marrying the dawn with the light of the moon," and I invite you to do the same. The darkness you've been immersed in will leave you soon. As it does, please don't forsake the pale, moon-like radiance that has provided you with a bit of guidance and consolation. Rather, bring along what it has taught you as you head into the far brighter phase you're entering. In other words, retain some of the wisdom the dim light has compelled you to learn.
Change wooshes Fresh into my brain and sets loose dusty cobwebs of habitual thought. Possibilities are myriad! Potentialities are reachable, and worth considering. I feel a flutter in my chest with anticipation of the unexpected and a brightening in my eyes. Perfectly timed with our move and our strong desire to de-clutter and simplify, I have come across several very inspiring pieces of writing - Your Money or Your Life, a book that has helped hundreds of thousands cut their expenses by focusing on their life values, and two blogs which are dedicated to minimalist living - "the less you have, the more epic your life": Rowdy Kittens, and Far Beyond the Stars.
It feels as if, very recently, a veil has been lifted in my thinking, and my mind and heart said, "Oh, yeah!" in their remembering: I've been thinking too small. I've been Being too small. My view has been too myopic: not in seeing the universe in the fractal-like details, but just .. letting the details be a universe in themselves. I've been experiencing a lot of anxiety lately. Learning to deal with it by breathing into it, but maybe I should have let it be an indicator to me that change is in order. Maybe I'm letting it be that indicator right now. I imagine myself to be a little mouse with my nose down trying to find the cheese at the end of the maze, when, if I would stand up I could see that the maze is located in the middle of a lush food forest (or cheese shop in Switzerland!).
From Far Beyond the Stars, 99% of the people in the world are content to exist within the confines of their own settled mediocrity. The boredom of sitting under florescent lights all day begins to set in over time. Their current situation burns into their psyche, and they stagnate.
The thought of rejecting the status-quo scares the crap out of them.
It starts with the idea that you have to be realistic. Everyone knows a horde of people who either are being realistic or will tell you to be realistic. Well, these people are wrong. They’re blinded by their own passivity.
They’ve given up. They’re walking zombies. You don’t want to be one of these people.
And more importantly, don’t listen to these people.
They call them worker drones for a reason. These people are not being compared to busy bees, they’re being compared to The Borg.
Does this sound familiar? When you look at yourself in the mirror are you beginning to see the last remnants of life seeping out of your soul?
I have dreams about Lucent Dossier (the performance company I danced with when I first came to CA) often. They stick with me. One that really hurt my heart was: that I was walking along a country road with them, and talking with them as they made their way to another magical gig, when I realized they didn't recognize me; I was a stranger to them. I looked down and was dressed 100% preppy with clothes from the mall. I felt ashamed. I know this sounds very shallow. But I have come to think of these dreams as oracles. What this one told me was that I was not being my true (magical) self. I was clothed in the coverings of someone with an inner life other than my own truth.
The most recent dream I had was that Lucent had marketed a fragrance. It was the Essence of Sensuality (not the narrow definition, but sensuality as drinking in life fully - with all of the senses). It was sold in individually enchanting, antique bottles with cute stoppers (I love tiny, unique bottles!). I rushed to the store to be the first to see them, and tried to make my way to the display secretly. I opened a bottle. The scent went on like metallic copper powder (like eye shadow), and smelled of fine sandalwood. The dream diverged from there.
My oracular interpretation of this is that I'm wanting to re-member how to drink deeply of Life, in the way that is so essential to the M.O. of Lucent Dossier. And, what's so awesome is that, as my parenting guru Scott Noelle always says, that awakening of Presence is always available; you simply need to open yourself to allowing it.
“The Master in the art of living
makes little distinction
between work and play,
labor and leisure,
mind and body,
education and recreation,
love and religion.
You hardly know which is which.
You simply pursue your vision of
excellence in whatever you do,
leaving others to decide whether
you are working or playing.
To you, it is always both.”
I didn't finish a "good enough" marriage, cull all my stuff and leave my hometown and family of friends, move thousands of miles, dance with a mystical circus, and be cleansed by fire in the Black Rock Desert, to become bogged down and fall asleep. I came to get down and get funky!
I finally watched Avatar. Since I don't watch tv, I didn't know anything about it except its popularity - which usually frees me from having to see something. As soon as I saw the fantastical creature on the cover (I love costuming!), I had to watch it. And of course it's not a story of a distant planet, but of our own blue and green ball. It re-minded me of our true essence, our birthright: to run and jump from treetop to treetop unafraid, to telepathically communicate with other animals because we are truly connected, to worship Nature because she really is our Mother, and to be 100% free in our own bodies, our own skin, because we are as regal and able and noble as any jungle animal.
I have been asleep and it's time to Wake Up!
From Far Beyond the Stars
It’s never too late to start having unreasonable expectations for yourself….
1. Set at least one unrealistic goal to achieve in the next year. I’ve become a firm believer that everyone should set unrealistic goals for themselves. Take a moment and think, draw, write down your unrealistic goals. For reference: last year my unrealistic goal was to work from anywhere, quit my job, and move to another city. Done. Done. Done.
2. Map out your ideal life. So you’ve set your unrealistic goals, now you need to visualize them. Tim Ferriss calls this practice Dreamlining. It’s the idea of mapping out your unrealistic ideal life. On that piece of paper, start adding more details to the unrealistic world you’re creating. Do you want to be sipping margaritas on the beach? Swigging wine with Colin Wright in New Zealand? Training to run marathon? Ask the girl of your dreams out on a date? Write it all down: but please, do NOT be realistic.
4. Remove the floor. Many people exist with a constant safety net to catch them if they fall. What if you remove that net? Take it away, and then start to have unreasonable expectations for yourself. The Bahamas or the gutter, which will it be? You’ll have no choice to fly to the top, because there are no other options.
5. Be unrealistic about what you don’t need. Just like thinking about what you unrealistically want, but the opposite. What can you survive without? Basically, everything. You can live in a room, eat Brussels sprouts and be happy. ..
10. Ignore everybody. People will nay-say you into oblivion, and they are not to be trusted. Do not listen to negative opinions or influences. You are able to accomplish anything if you put your mind to it.
Via Dream (artistic director of Lucent Dossier) ~ Those who achieve great things, defeat long odds, and become legends didn't have anything you don't have. They just kept showing up, expecting a miracle, long after everyone else got practical. ~ Notes from the Universewaking life
SACRED ADVERTISEMENT (from Rob) Your imagination is the single most important asset you possess. It's your power to create mental pictures of things that don't exist yet and that you want to bring into being. It's the magic wand you use to shape your future. And so in your own way, you are a prophet. You generate countless predictions every day. Your imagination is the source, tirelessly churning out images of what you will be doing later. *
Monday, August 16, 2010
Saturday, August 07, 2010
I have noticed throughout my adult life that when words fail to surface to describe my inner life, other forms of creativity have taken center stage. This is the way it was for me towards the end of my college career ~ with a focus in Creative Writing; I couldn't bare to eek out another externally-demanded piece of written "creativity" but I found myself drawing and painting again for the first time in years (I can't think of a more effective way to rid a young enthusiastic soul of her creativity than by making it a major in an institution where your output equals your worth. This, and more, is why the ideas of Unschooling resonate so strongly with me.).
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
-Going outside, even just for a minute.
-Riding my bike, even just for a short errand. I feel free. And especially now that I have a front rack for bags so that I can carry things while also carrying Anjali (like produce from the farmers' market), I am set and feel so free.
-Going to farmers' markets. I love them.
-Being creative in the kitchen. I am reminded over and over. Unless I'm trying to rush, and even then sometimes, I end up having fun.
-My voice lessons.
-Swimming. I love being in water. Playing in waves at the beach, and going underwater in a pool (*not* doing laps) remind me of being a kid. Ahhh!
-Jogging. Even though it often feels like a "should".
-Gardening - even just pulling a few weeds or picking and feeding some clover to the chickens through the garden gate.
-Dancing - even just boogying a little hip bump to the music.
-Taking a shower. I don't shower daily. When I get around to it, it always feels good.
-Rubbing my face with coconut oil (that's what I use as lotion).
-Giving a dollar to a sidewalk musician.
-Petting a kitty cat on the sidewalk.
-Having an orgasm.
-Being outside in the sunshine.
What a feel-good list! It is insightful to see so many parts of my everyday life that truly give me pleasure.And interesting to ponder that some feel like "shoulds" even while being on a feel-good list.