Thursday, August 18, 2005

stop the train!

man, i'm such a huge bundle of emotions (i would say "these days," but i know y'all would correct me on that one!!) it is really exhausting. this trying to live conscious and aware business is hard work. sometimes i think it would be such a relief just to sell my soul for the ticket to suburbia, the glistening-toothed husband, plasma-screen tv and not ever look inward again. wouldn't it?? come on. i try to be honest on this blog and not sugar-coat or vaseline-smear the lens, although i suppose that's somewhat inherent in the storytelling. so here you go. just as cheesey as the "gratitude" blogs, but not as gushy. do superheroes ever have bad days, where they huddle back at the bat-cave and cry and pet the cat? yeah. i guess if i think on it, being a superhero does make them isolated and vulnerable. i'm experiencing such high highs and such low lows, and having trouble keeping my paddle in the current. i look around and see a whole lot of uncertainty, and a few possible definites. trying my best to learn, i ask the superheroes i know for advice, but they're too busy fighting evil and beating badguys to even hear me, the little mouse tugging at their cape. hey, batman--can you shed some light on this humble trainee? i gotta lot to learn! does the rollercoaster ever even out, or is that the nature of the ride? what's the view like from up there? do the low lows negate the high highs? are the high highs WORTH the low lows?
sincerely in your tutelage,

1 comment:

k. said...

I know that one, that almost savage tilt-a-whirl emotional swingset...
Apathy is much much worse.