sometimes

sometimes, after your best attempts at higher living fail, you just gotta give in and get drunk. yup. well that's what i did last night. i ventured forth, my barracuda loaded with everything i'd need for a bicycle journey that would take me a few days closer to freedom and independence. i made it all the way to the amtrak station downtown (that's right, downtown sac-to) and ordered my ticket outta town, when the lady at the counter (a grumpy lady, i might add) brought to my attention the fact that i didn't even have my ID with me. (i had my superego, though--never leave home without it.! HA! sorry 'bout that one) my I.D. the laminated bit of officially-sealed dots and dashes that is proof to anyone who wonders that i, the tiffster, do indeed exist. well i felt pretty nonexistent at that point. can't even use cash to buy a ticket to nowhere if you don't exist. boohoo i use my other proof of existence--my cellphone (surely you can't exist without a cellphone "these days" can you??)--to call troyboy who in real time rummages through my few and cluttered boxes to find my passport. no, don't help me, i say! i'll do it myself!! and ride off wiping away the tears of my wounded pride. an hour later, troyboy has driven my passport downtown, i've missed that train, and it's almost dark. i putter around the downtown sidewalks (home to vagrants and a few tourists on this sunday evening) and try to patch together the moral of this frustration. to my favorite spot, the capitol rose garden, where i anonymously warm a bench and admire a robin as she fluffs her wings and splashes in the center fountain. a phonecall to the ho-swah always makes things better.
an hour after that, troyboy and i are well on our way to nowhere happily, rounding the corner to intoxication on the patio of the pyramid brewery (that's right, folks--in sunny downtown sacramento--stop by for a fresh pint!!). hoswah and teesa call and the four of us clink glasses cellularly.
what happened next--well, stumbling around the capitol grounds in the dark, i think tb and i were lucky not to get a light shined on us by a capitol copper. giggley madness and flash photography.
i ended up right where i needed to be.