turning point

i wrote a letter to my lucent dossier family that pretty succinctly sums up this major Fork-in-the-Road that i feel i have successfully navigated. since it says it best, i thought i'd let you read it, and officially share my Big News.
take note: the closing bit, starting with the big-letter parts, hold true for you,~~my extend-a-family here at WIDE WORLD OF TIF, too!!

my loves~
it's time for me to share some good news with you from the Land of Tif:
i'm attending "natural chef" school at Bauman College in berkeley (look it up! www.baumancollege.com/ it's coo-ool!!).
this is a holistic nutrition school, and the program i am in is an intensive, five-month training program. very hands-on and roll-up-yer-sleeves.
over the winter i had been all-inward-looking, imploring of the universe to give me direction, and trying very hard to love myself and be patient. feeling very much at the end of my rope~~and losing my grip~~i pleaded for help: anything! something? pLeAse? and the universe gave me a word, "food." the last time i met with you wonderluvlies (at rehearsal) was later that same day. i let this sit and waited with open hands. within the weekend, opportunities were presented, connections were made, and i had found the website for bauman college. i received their info in the mail, and ~with uncanny-perfect timing~ was able to enroll for the spring course that began THE NEXT DAY(!), the 5-month course finishes the weekend before burning man. the timing could not have been more perfectly suited to my life at this exact moment.
troy is very supportive and excited, and i LOVE class so much i can barely sleep at night!! this feels so right, i can't even tell you. i feel as if i've truly finally fully returned to my self (after how many years?), and can finally dig in to my life's calling.
i feel so grounded, and deeply satisfied~~and invigorated in the way you feel as you're *nailing* that choreography onstage and everyone's loving it, only the feeling doesn't go away when i get offstage.
SO, i'm gonna be very much absorbed in this process for the next 5 months, attending classes 3 days a week and becoming a kick-ass natural chef. i'm going to be very envious of your magical process and adventures, but i feel so good about where i am at in my life that i will be all-smiles from the audience.
I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!!! YOU INSPIRE ME MOMENT-BY-MOMENT!! KEEP BE-ING IT! KEEP LIVING IT!!
i love sharing this life with you~~the beautiful family i created for myself from my own heart. what perfection!!
kisses, elf-luvins, and abundant magical light~
~tif


muchas muchas gracias(!!!) to: ms. woo-lovely and "milsey" for their open hearts, listening ears, dreaming and scheming!
my favorite gYrl for her professional recommendation, and eternal support,
brer, once again, for the safe landing-pad, the idea bouncer-of-back, and Everything,
and!! my sweetest sealion!! for his patience and love and support even in the not-understanding parts of this drippy rainy season process, for his unending encouragement and enthusiasm and "bouyant" spirit. i marvel that you have stuck around, but i sure am glad!!