superhero soulsister

let's hear it for jesse--
i got to hang out with her at her 100% art home while i was in LA a few weeks ago. sitting in her space while she painted, all relaxed and cool, was soothing and inspirational. this girl's got her head on straight (well, at least as straight as we freakyfolks would want it!!).
madlove and freeflowing creativity to ya! i raise my sewing shears in salut!

screw you, junkmail!!

well-- i can't stand getting formletter salescomments for the blog that is a personal and cared-for account of my life.


who actually responds to those things??


for more, go to: http://www.ooze.com/finger/html/history.html

sac shout-out

people are always askin'--sacramento? why are you in sacramento? well--i like the downtown a lot. it's people-sized; i can ride my bike in bike lanes everywhere i need to go, on huge tree-lined streets. it's a low-key landing spot/home base.

that said,
gotta give props to my new favorite wireless spot in sac--Capital Garage. a full bar, including beer on-tap, plus excellent coffee, and yummy fresh food--breakfast through late-night. troyboy models.

priddy iddo house

bri, tb, and my new digs!!

lucent lovelies take two and three

photos by roger from our most recent RAWKIN show on saturday.
yeh!

blog junk mail--stay away!!

well, hate to say it, but not surprised--junkmail has found blogs.
if you are truly interested in my blog i appreciate and welcome your comments. if not--


DON'T SEND ME JUNK MAIL!!!!

i know the people/businesses this needs to reach will not heed, but it makes me feel better to write it.

i mean, come on, people--you used the same tag line and smiley-face on three or more different hits on my site. gimme a break!

rememory

clarity

nestled for a week under-wing of superheroes, i'm feeling like taking that leap again. through the framework of seemingly disconnected weeks, beams of clarity come into focus.

once again sending out gratitude to so many who shine light on my path. i love you all!!

enchantment

rehearsed under full-moonlight tonight.

the beat goes on

i'm having a really hard time getting down in words my impression of burning man. for now, life keeps truckin'--
--tb, mackindaddy, and i have found our own digs!! yippee!! a lovely two-level home close to the downtown action, and a minute's walk (or bike!) to the american river trail!!!
and, i'm back in LA, the lucent dossier beacon directing us home for another foray into madness.
went with dream to see the site of this upcoming show on saturday--a huge, multi-dimensional, multi-layed festival in a (temporarily) roofless warehouse downtown! it's fun to tag along and feel like i'm part of the "scene"--makin' decisions, bein' a part of the action! staying at the do lab and grateful to soak up a bunch of that post-burning man playa love energy. :)

participate, dammit!!

manifest

Capricorn Horoscope for week of September 8, 2005 (--free will astrology, of course--)

Back when it was still a fledgling business in the 1950s, the McDonald's hamburger franchise caught the attention of a salesman named Ray Kroc. He joined the team as an executive, and soon began thinking about buying the company outright. His advisors counseled him against it, but Kroc said he had "a feeling in his funny bone" that it was the right thing to do. Years later, he had become a billionaire, renowned as one of the world's titans of industry. I'm not necessarily saying you will amass a comparable fortune, Capricorn, but decisions you make in the coming weeks could be as life-changing as Kroc's--and maybe even instrumental in ensuring that you fulfill the mission you came to Earth to carry out. Trust the feelings in your funny bone.

representin'

sheltowee models this year's hot items on the playa.

cheese

it was the cheese!! ;)

"thinking of you"

as i get up my get-up to boogy-down in the desert, my heart continually turns its gaze on the past weekend: a sensuous feast on the point reyes dunes with my closest family. a transcendent, super-conscious extravaganza. it felt as if, insulated from time, we had an intimate sand world all to ourselves and our senses. it was perfect and real. i love you guys.

take it away, rob!

another fine oracle from the master brezsny:

Let's discuss the differences between dumb, unproductive pain and smart, useful pain. The former is the kind you keep being drawn back to out of habit. It's familiar, and therefore perversely comfortable. The latter is the kind of pain that surprises you with valuable teachings and inspires you to see the world with new eyes. While stupid pain is often born of fear, wise pain is stirred up by love. The dumb, unproductive stuff comes from allowing yourself to be controlled by your early conditioning and from doing things that are out of harmony with your essence. The smart, useful variety arises out of a willingness to live passionately and with a sense of adventure. Can you guess which type I'm urging you to gravitate toward right now, Capricorn?

and:

A Spell to Commit Pronoia, by psychotherapist Jennifer Welwood:

Willing to experience aloneness,
I discover connection everywhere;
Turning to face my fear,
I meet the warrior who lives within;
Opening to my loss,
I am given unimaginable gifts;
Surrendering into emptiness,
I find fullness without end.

Each condition I flee from pursues me.
Each condition I welcome transforms me
And becomes itself transformed
Into its radiant jewel-like essence.
I bow to the one who has made it so,
Who has crafted this Master Game;
To play it is pure delight,
To honor it is true devotion.

the view from up here

and just in case it seems like i'm forgetting--how's this for a high high?

third time's a charm?

yeah, so--remember that solo bike trip i was doing? i'll tell you about it when it happens. sadder but wiser, i suppose. attempt numero dos--let's say .. ended in winters, california (what--never heard of it?), at 5am when officer ramirez wrote me up. it was a "warning" and not a ticket, though, so i guess i have that to be thankful for. that and my wonderous cellphone again.

stop the train!

man, i'm such a huge bundle of emotions (i would say "these days," but i know y'all would correct me on that one!!) it is really exhausting. this trying to live conscious and aware business is hard work. sometimes i think it would be such a relief just to sell my soul for the ticket to suburbia, the glistening-toothed husband, plasma-screen tv and not ever look inward again. wouldn't it?? come on. i try to be honest on this blog and not sugar-coat or vaseline-smear the lens, although i suppose that's somewhat inherent in the storytelling. so here you go. just as cheesey as the "gratitude" blogs, but not as gushy. do superheroes ever have bad days, where they huddle back at the bat-cave and cry and pet the cat? yeah. i guess if i think on it, being a superhero does make them isolated and vulnerable. i'm experiencing such high highs and such low lows, and having trouble keeping my paddle in the current. i look around and see a whole lot of uncertainty, and a few possible definites. trying my best to learn, i ask the superheroes i know for advice, but they're too busy fighting evil and beating badguys to even hear me, the little mouse tugging at their cape. hey, batman--can you shed some light on this humble trainee? i gotta lot to learn! does the rollercoaster ever even out, or is that the nature of the ride? what's the view like from up there? do the low lows negate the high highs? are the high highs WORTH the low lows?
sincerely in your tutelage,
--tif

sometimes

sometimes, after your best attempts at higher living fail, you just gotta give in and get drunk. yup. well that's what i did last night. i ventured forth, my barracuda loaded with everything i'd need for a bicycle journey that would take me a few days closer to freedom and independence. i made it all the way to the amtrak station downtown (that's right, downtown sac-to) and ordered my ticket outta town, when the lady at the counter (a grumpy lady, i might add) brought to my attention the fact that i didn't even have my ID with me. (i had my superego, though--never leave home without it.! HA! sorry 'bout that one) my I.D. the laminated bit of officially-sealed dots and dashes that is proof to anyone who wonders that i, the tiffster, do indeed exist. well i felt pretty nonexistent at that point. can't even use cash to buy a ticket to nowhere if you don't exist. boohoo i use my other proof of existence--my cellphone (surely you can't exist without a cellphone "these days" can you??)--to call troyboy who in real time rummages through my few and cluttered boxes to find my passport. no, don't help me, i say! i'll do it myself!! and ride off wiping away the tears of my wounded pride. an hour later, troyboy has driven my passport downtown, i've missed that train, and it's almost dark. i putter around the downtown sidewalks (home to vagrants and a few tourists on this sunday evening) and try to patch together the moral of this frustration. to my favorite spot, the capitol rose garden, where i anonymously warm a bench and admire a robin as she fluffs her wings and splashes in the center fountain. a phonecall to the ho-swah always makes things better.
an hour after that, troyboy and i are well on our way to nowhere happily, rounding the corner to intoxication on the patio of the pyramid brewery (that's right, folks--in sunny downtown sacramento--stop by for a fresh pint!!). hoswah and teesa call and the four of us clink glasses cellularly.
what happened next--well, stumbling around the capitol grounds in the dark, i think tb and i were lucky not to get a light shined on us by a capitol copper. giggley madness and flash photography.
i ended up right where i needed to be.